Date Your Age

So I recently retired this dating ideology I had that “I’m not gonna date *insert guy here* because I can’t envision myself married to that kind of person.”

Up until now my thought process has basically been that if I couldn’t envision us happily together for the long-term, I didn’t want to be bothered with a string of pointless dates leading to the inevitable breakup.

Sounds efficient, right?

But I finally hung that up. Partially for the reasons I’m about to explore…and partially because that’s a quick way to end up with no dates LOL.

But the main reason I let that go is because I’ve realized, I’m not at the stage of “dating to marry.” I am 23 years old! lmao.

And of course that’s a subjective idea. There are regional factors, religious or cultural factors…or even plain ol fellheadoverheelsinlove factors as to why a woman would or wouldn’t typically get married at my age.

But here in fast & free Los Angeles–and California in general–it’s not the norm to get married at this age. I’ve still got a few years before I look around and everyone my age is married with a family. So I can put that on the shelf for now and start….

dating as an educational tool! ;)


I think it’s important, and not necessarily intuitive, to think of dating as more than one-dimensional. Sure, we mainly date to find a life partner. But that’s not the only reason to date.

You can also date with the objective of getting to know yourself better. You could be dating to improve your interpersonal skills. Maybe you’re dating just to build comfort in the idea of eventually sharing your life with another person.

 

There are a bunch of potential dating stages, many of which I think you’ll access more naturally at different ages and stages of your own life.

So right now, I’m learning what I like and what I don’t like! Which is just as essential a part of dating as getting to the part where you only date people you could feasibly be happy with long term, right?

When I thought about it, I honestly have no clear idea of what I want…so how could I be dating for marriage?

 

What do you think of as the stages of dating? What stage would you say you’re in?

 

…Or do you think I’m totally nuts and you married your high school sweetheart right after graduation the old fashioned way? ;)
** TBH this is just a thinly veiled attempt to solicit tales of romance…I love a good love story!! lmao
–  ♥ Sade
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2 thoughts on “Date Your Age

  1. Oh, you’re so young. Take all the time you can and learn exactly what you like and don’t like. Date for fun, but don’t waste your time with someone who won’t end up being what you want and need. You may say you’re just having fun, but eventually you’ll look around and realize it’s been 5 years into the wrong relationship, and you’re not as young as you once were.

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    1. ahh that’s my fear! I can probably be content with anyone that stimulates my mind and is at least mildly affectionate lol. Just easygoing that way. So I have to remind myself that time is still passing, life is still happening! gotta get serious eventually (…but not yet ;) lol)

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